Recently, I had an unfortunate experience with this situation. I always had my doubts about men, because I never trusted them much. However, I did respect the ones who "secretly" did "dirt," provided for their families and still accommodated their wives. As treacherous as this appears, it always made sense to me. What NEVER made sense was the debauchery and deceitfulness involved with CHEATING!
I think I am more upset about women who don't know their place and how to act towards someone's fiancé, girlfriend or wife. Especially if you know they are in a relationship or living together. There are rules to this game and you should make a conscious effort to follow them. I was very accommodating to Lucas and his so called "FRIEND!" I've always been down to earth and understanding, never the jealous type. I always felt it was a waste of time to hate a man's ex, for what? He had a life before you and you had one before him. The one thing I hated about my ex-husband was his jealousy and over reaction towards my male friends; because I NEVER acted that way with the mother of his children or the girl I knew he LOVED. I allowed them to call my house when we were married, because his children were a priority to me and the mother of those boys needed to be able to reach him at ALL TIMES! Besides that, she was really a beautiful girl and I LOVED HER SONS! His ex-girlfriend was someone I knew he TRULY LOVED and I'd NEVER DENY THEM THEIR FRIENDSHIP, especially since I knew I'd married him out of revenge.
When they (his ex's) called, the one thing I respected is the friendship we all shared. They called, we said our Hello's and I passed him the phone, leaving the room...so they could talk. We all respected each other and the boundaries were set, basically we respected the "GAME!" Looking back, I remember being friends with both families of the two most important women in my ex-husband's life. The world is small, I met many of them by chance and just knowing every damn body. We all got along, even his first love's sister was someone I attended beauty school with and considered a very good friend. She was older than us, but she was sweet and we were very close. Hell...she's the person who taught me how to master finger waves! Everyone kept it a buck, so we had no time for sneaky, slithering, behind the back foolishness. Funny thing, my ex-husband didn't share the liberal views towards my male "FRIENDS!" He acted real stand offish with my Home Boys and always accused me of cheating on him! Which is why all this nonsense with Lucas makes me disgusted and sick to my stomach.
Disgusted because, I am not the girl who acts out unless I am provoked and it seems Lucas and his "FRIEND" don't seem to understand the magnitude of the TRANSGRESSION committed against me. Don't lie and proclaim you grew up with someone, while you sneak around to conversate for years; pretending you guys are just good "FRIENDS," and you're sleeping together. Sleeping together as "FRIENDS" having UNPROTECTED SEX, until a BABY comes out of it and she wants RESPECT, ACCEPTANCE & VALIDATION! Is she SERIOUS? She did the one thing you NEVER do, try to make her presence in his life known and you are well aware of the circumstances. A word of advice ladies: If you want to sleep with someone's man, NEVER find yourself speaking to them on ANY LEVEL...In fact, LEAVE THEM ALONE! I have had the luxury of answering the cell phone when she'd call, seeing their texts and in this day of social media (on Face Book) she sees I'm friends with people in his family and begins to like my comments! NO NO...STAY AWAY! Your intentions are him and let it be that, and stay under the radar. What would be best is not to incriminate yourself on any level, yet she turns around and FRIEND REQUESTS me!
Do you see the madness? I've even told this broad I suspected something and I knew they were sleeping together and to just LEAVE ME ALONE & ENJOY HIM! Your focus is not to befriend a girlfriend, fiancé or wife. If possible STAY AWAY...Who knows what was being said to her, she should have sense enough not to try to befriend me, PERIOD! Many people told me this whole debacle was my fault, but I gave Lucas the benefit of the doubt, because that's who I am and he betrayed me. Some people told me to work it out, see how I feel in a year... Well? I am not too enthused and not only have I moved on mentally, I realized many things. The most important thing I realized is; lying is really detrimental to everyone involved. What amazes me is how men don't realize when to hold em' and when to fold em'! When you've screwed up a relationship you were in, for the "FRIEND" you have...ALL BETS ARE OFF and it's just a matter of time before you're put out to the '"GREENER PASTURE!" Because the woman you betrayed, is booking ahead with a "FRIEND" of hers and it won't feel so good to you when she finds comfort in the arms of her new "FRIEND!"
I think I am more upset about women who don't know their place and how to act towards someone's fiancé, girlfriend or wife. Especially if you know they are in a relationship or living together. There are rules to this game and you should make a conscious effort to follow them. I was very accommodating to Lucas and his so called "FRIEND!" I've always been down to earth and understanding, never the jealous type. I always felt it was a waste of time to hate a man's ex, for what? He had a life before you and you had one before him. The one thing I hated about my ex-husband was his jealousy and over reaction towards my male friends; because I NEVER acted that way with the mother of his children or the girl I knew he LOVED. I allowed them to call my house when we were married, because his children were a priority to me and the mother of those boys needed to be able to reach him at ALL TIMES! Besides that, she was really a beautiful girl and I LOVED HER SONS! His ex-girlfriend was someone I knew he TRULY LOVED and I'd NEVER DENY THEM THEIR FRIENDSHIP, especially since I knew I'd married him out of revenge.
When they (his ex's) called, the one thing I respected is the friendship we all shared. They called, we said our Hello's and I passed him the phone, leaving the room...so they could talk. We all respected each other and the boundaries were set, basically we respected the "GAME!" Looking back, I remember being friends with both families of the two most important women in my ex-husband's life. The world is small, I met many of them by chance and just knowing every damn body. We all got along, even his first love's sister was someone I attended beauty school with and considered a very good friend. She was older than us, but she was sweet and we were very close. Hell...she's the person who taught me how to master finger waves! Everyone kept it a buck, so we had no time for sneaky, slithering, behind the back foolishness. Funny thing, my ex-husband didn't share the liberal views towards my male "FRIENDS!" He acted real stand offish with my Home Boys and always accused me of cheating on him! Which is why all this nonsense with Lucas makes me disgusted and sick to my stomach.
Disgusted because, I am not the girl who acts out unless I am provoked and it seems Lucas and his "FRIEND" don't seem to understand the magnitude of the TRANSGRESSION committed against me. Don't lie and proclaim you grew up with someone, while you sneak around to conversate for years; pretending you guys are just good "FRIENDS," and you're sleeping together. Sleeping together as "FRIENDS" having UNPROTECTED SEX, until a BABY comes out of it and she wants RESPECT, ACCEPTANCE & VALIDATION! Is she SERIOUS? She did the one thing you NEVER do, try to make her presence in his life known and you are well aware of the circumstances. A word of advice ladies: If you want to sleep with someone's man, NEVER find yourself speaking to them on ANY LEVEL...In fact, LEAVE THEM ALONE! I have had the luxury of answering the cell phone when she'd call, seeing their texts and in this day of social media (on Face Book) she sees I'm friends with people in his family and begins to like my comments! NO NO...STAY AWAY! Your intentions are him and let it be that, and stay under the radar. What would be best is not to incriminate yourself on any level, yet she turns around and FRIEND REQUESTS me!
Do you see the madness? I've even told this broad I suspected something and I knew they were sleeping together and to just LEAVE ME ALONE & ENJOY HIM! Your focus is not to befriend a girlfriend, fiancé or wife. If possible STAY AWAY...Who knows what was being said to her, she should have sense enough not to try to befriend me, PERIOD! Many people told me this whole debacle was my fault, but I gave Lucas the benefit of the doubt, because that's who I am and he betrayed me. Some people told me to work it out, see how I feel in a year... Well? I am not too enthused and not only have I moved on mentally, I realized many things. The most important thing I realized is; lying is really detrimental to everyone involved. What amazes me is how men don't realize when to hold em' and when to fold em'! When you've screwed up a relationship you were in, for the "FRIEND" you have...ALL BETS ARE OFF and it's just a matter of time before you're put out to the '"GREENER PASTURE!" Because the woman you betrayed, is booking ahead with a "FRIEND" of hers and it won't feel so good to you when she finds comfort in the arms of her new "FRIEND!"
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