LET'S GET SOMETHING STRAIGHT...

Lately I've been doing  a lot of thinking and amazingly I got an epiphany. Is it me or do people think you owe them something? Do people who've been dealt a certain hand in life, expect sympathy as a side order of entitlement. Why is it people who have more than you, always want a favor of some sort? And don't realize maybe you don't want to be bothered after all. All my life I have watched people act this way. Who or what started them on this path of "SELF ENTITLEMENT," is no mystery, but nonetheless people like this are the ULTIMATE PAIN IN THE ASS!

One thing my mother raised us not to do is think the world owes you anything! Don't knock on neighbors doors asking for sugar, milk or food. Don't wear other people's clothes, shoes and never borrow money from anyone, I don't care how BROKE you are, NEVER ASK ANYONE FOR MONEY! I've lived in my building for years and not one neighbor in here can say we've ever borrowed ANYTHING from anyone...WE WERE TOO PROUD! Mommy raised us that way, to have some DAMN DIGNITY ABOUT OURSELVES! People with the most, brag about having this and that, but they always NEED SOMETHING from the less fortunate.

Growing up, I never liked my friends asking to "BORROW" anything. Really? Have you no PRIDE or SELF WORTH where you don't mind "BORROWING OR WEARING OTHER PEOPLE'S SHIT? Are you serious? I THANK GOD FOR KATIE, YOU HEAR ME! My mother raised us with such a sense of PRIDE and HONOR for what we DO...whatever we BELIEVED IN!

This is why I stay alone. Because I don't want to be RESPONSIBLE for people, their ISSUES, WANTS, NEEDS OR PROBLEMS-I HAVE MY OWN and THAT"S ALL TO IT!

I desperately try not to be a burden or bothersome to people. I am scarce and believe in being alone ninety nine percent of the time. The one thing I don't want is new friends, it always leads to disappointment or better yet BETRAYAL!

The last thing I need is friendships based on what I can do for you. Because you can't do anything for me because I won't allow anyone to help me but so much. I REFUSE TO BE TALKED ABOUT! I've learned so much about WOMEN and their petty jealousies. My life is no Crystal Stair and things are quite RAGGEDY on the home front. But one thing I can say is Mommy taught me how to HOLD MY OWN and not LAY UP WITH A MAN WHO DOESN'T CARE ENOUGH TO GIVE SHIT ABOUT YOU! By the time I was thirty, I was done with "STREET NIGGA'S, and JAIL NIGGA'S! As a matter of fact I was twenty six, when I decided I needed to REVAMP my life. No way would I trek to Riker's Island, let alone ride a van upstate to visit a Nigga who'd come home to someone else. My ex husband gave me a sneak preview of that once and I decided after him...I wasn't even going to a COURT DATE for moral support! You got yourself in this mess and you're going get yourself out of it. I aint your Momma and I aint babysitting a grown ass man, smart enough to make the right decisions, but refuses to.

The same applies to my female friends and associates. I am so worn with nonsense, we are way too old for a lot of this nonsense and I am living with so much regret. Regret I can't seem to get from under. Regret knowing I was DESTINED FOR GREATNESS, living a life better than the one I'm living today. I am not supposed to be living in Far Rockaway, in a building and unhappy! Am I thankful for my small blessings? YOU BETTER BELIEVE I AM!

Because GOD HAS BLESSED SO MUCH I DON'T WANT FOR ANYTHING! HE BLESSES ME DAILY AND SUPPLIES MY EVERY NEED AND I AM SO GRATEFUL I DON'T HAVE TO ASK MY FRIENDS OR ASSOCIATES FOR ANYTHING! MY FAMILY LOOKS OUT FOR ME IF I NEED THEM, I DON'T HAVE TO BEG ANYONE FOR ANYTHING! Besides before I ask anyone for anything, I'LL DO WITHOUT IT! Especially, if my folks can't give it to me!

So people please do me a favor, count your blessings for they are many, the world is cold...but GOD IS GOOD and I'M THANKFUL I DON'T THINK ANYONE OWES ME ANYTHING!